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July 3, 2001
August 3, 2001
6 Weeks Pg (tomorrow)
It is now time for me to move on and leave the site that has been a great source of comfort for me for over a year now. I had been reading the site for awhile before becoming a writer; all in all, it has really been quite an experience. Not what I thought it would be, but then again, what in life ever is?
It’s been a long hard journey but in some ways it really has been sweet. A nightmare a lot of the time, but sweet when I think how far I have come and all I have achieved. I have learned so much more about getting pregnant than simply when ovulation occurs and how many sperm are in the average (ahem) ejaculate. I have learned so much more about patience and tenacity and priorities and love. I have learned that patience almost always pays off. I have learned that tenacity guarantees that there is always hope. If you don’t keep trying you will never reach your goal, and that is definitely guaranteed. I learned that I had to get my priorities straight if I REALLY wanted this to happen, even if that meant perhaps spending infinite amounts of money, sweat, heartache and tears to achieve my goal. However, the most important thing I learned is how much I am loved. I know that sounds incredibly self-serving, but that is not the way I meant it. I learned that my husband was willing to put up with my many mood swings, my melt-downs, my give-up mentality all because he loved me so much. I learned that I had so many family members and close friends who loved me enough to support me during this past year when I really started to lose it. And finally, I learned that in some remotely cyber way, I had so much love from people who only know me through my diary, and I cannot tell you what an incredible feeling that is. I don’t even know how to articulate the way I felt reading my many emails and posts on my board of congratulations, people telling me that when they read that I was pregnant, they cried actual tears of joy, told me that they had been praying for me personally. I know many other pg women out there on these diaries received the same congratulations as I did, so I don’t mean to personalize this like I am so special, all I mean is that we ALL have a love for one another through this site that goes beyond your average caring and concern. What an incredibly lucky bunch we are to have this experience. I sometimes wonder how I would have made it without you all.
I do plan to move on to the Pregnancy Diaries and hope that you will follow along with me there. I am still afraid that something bad will happen but in the meantime, I am simply trying to maintain a positive outlook and enjoy this ride.
Out of respect for the women still TTC, I am not going to post anything more on this site regarding my pregnancy, my symptoms, or my doctor’s appointments. I know how I felt when I was still TTC and would see tag lines and updates for months of pg women still waiting to move to the Pregnancy Diaries. Mind you, no offense to those women who do this, I just find it would be hypocritical of me to do so when it bothered me so at the time. If any of you are interested in what is going on in my pg life, I will post an update on my boards very shortly entitled “Update” with the date attached, and naturally, I will soon provide my first PG Diary Entry as soon as I am transferred over there.
I wish much luck to all the women out there still trying. You just keep on keeping on. A special good luck and pg vibe to Aimee F. who just posted that she was having her blastocyst transfer this week. I wish her all the best of luck.
Finally, I want to thank Megan M., Jenn B., Tammy W., Nino B., Dawn L. and Wendy S. and Barb H. for being such great email buddies and women of support for me in these past few months. Tammy and Nino, all we have left is you two out of our little group and from the way all of us are pg at two month intervals, I suppose that means that you two will both be pg by December. I pray for you both every day.
Good-bye ladies, good luck and please don’t forget me.
Love always,
Corinne and her baby
EDD 4-1-02
PS: Of course, it wouldn’t be a Corinne good-bye if I didn’t include at least one smart ass remark, lest you think I turned into this sickeningly sweet mom-to-be (ha!). I just want to add that if you take anything from my personal TTC experience, let it be this: anyone who tells you that stress will keep you from getting pg, that you need to simply “relax” and it will happen, is well deserving of a good smack hard enough to leave a hand print. I am pure evidence that this is not (always/necessarily) the case. The month I got pregnant was one of the most stressful in my life. I became unemployed, I had a HUGE fight with my Dad to the point where we were not on speaking terms, my sister got married and I had to face my Dad at this wedding. Shortly thereafter, my sister tells me she is TTC. I could not have had more stress than if I had been diagnosed with leprosy, cancer and AIDS all at the same time. And yet, I got pregnant. I had sex only 2, count them, TWO, times in one cycle. SO - if anyone tells any of you ladies out there to just “RELAX,” you can tell them for me to kiss my narrow ass. It will happen when God/fate/destiny/biology determines the time is correct. Lightning always strikes when you least expect it, you can bank on that...
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