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Home › Diaries › Amy's › July 30, 2000

Amy's Diary Entries

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July 30, 2000

TTC #1, C#15, CD20-ish???

Welcome to basketcaseville!!! I am very nervous with my upcoming laparoscopic surgery. Everyone has been extremely helpful and supportive as I prepare myself for this adventure! I am just a bit anxious.

Troy's and my only wish in life is to have a baby! I can't keep from asking myself, on a daily basis, WHY is this happening to us??? I have a very strong faith and it's very hard in times like these to keep that faith! I feel very guilty at times questioning why terrible, life-altering things happen to good people. Perhaps one day, I will have the answer. I am afraid, however, that it may not be the answer I want to hear!!

Sorry to be on a soapbox -- just needed to vent that with you.

We have a new nephew in our family! He is very sweet, truly a gift from heaven!!! I do have to say that being at the hospital on the maternity floor was not the easiest thing for Troy or me. When I saw that little bundle, I just broke down and bawled! I am so thrilled for my brother-in-law and sister-in-law, but we just want to experience that, too. I have probably not been the greatest sister-in-law during her pregnancy -- I had to distance myself a bit. Now, I regret that. I will eventually talk with them about my feelings.

Wow, I am just not a big ray of sunshine, am I???? Perhaps after my laparoscopy, I will feel refreshed and ready to hit it again. I am not sure if they'll make us hold off a month or not. At this point, what's another month????

Congratulations to all the new mommies-to-be!!! I wish you all the very best. I know that everyone will be great parents.

I will have more information later! Thanks to all of the girls who have pulled me through some dumpy times!! I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you all!!!

Lots of hugs and positive vibes to everyone!!! May we all have a great upcoming cycle!!!!

XOXOXOXO~
Amy



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