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Home › Diaries › Amanda › Introduction

Amanda's Diary Entries

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Welcome to the "ever lovin precon"'s emotional journey

Introduction

Hello and let me introduce myself. My name is Amanda, I'm newly married and shocking as it was to me, will be TTC in just a few short months. Don't get me wrong, we're not preventing it now – we're just not in that active TTC mode. We both anticipate a long journey, which is why we're not preventing it. But alas, here is our story:

When I was 18, I was married to my live-together boyfriend, because we were living together. (Christian family didn't care for that much!) While we were together, we dealt with nothing better than cheating, mental abuse and just bad stuff for three years. Long story short, we divorced when I was 21. Why tell you this story? Because for three years we had been bd'ing and nothing happened, nadda, negatory! It was within this time of infertility that I began to read diaries on iParenting. It was very moving and inspirational to know that there were others who worked so hard to become parents, and even some that knew they were supposed to be parents but not necessarily through the pre-natal period (adoption, which we're open for). This site was very supportive then, and I hope as we begin our TTC journey it will again be supportive!

Alright, well all that was back in early 2001. After it all, I got MY life back on track and began getting to know me and what I was about! (Sounds crazy that you've been working and living for 21 years and you still don't know yourself huh?) Regardless, I took a few years to get an education, an apartment and just grow internally. It was within that period that I bought a home and ended up finding my now husband, Eddie, on the internet.

How funny it is that I say we met on the internet when truth be told we very well could have known each other from so many other circumstances in our lives. Eddie was great friends with my grandparent's neighbor as a child. He and I hung out in the same circle of friends when I was 14 and he was 18. And then as adults, he was good friends with my manager at a local restaurant. Yet, through all of it, we met online in a chat room, talking about our favorite baseball team, the Chicago Cubs!

Regardless, Eddie and I have been intimate and not protected for about a year now, give or take a few months. Nothing has happened yet, and my periods finally regulated themselves for the first time in my life a few months ago, although I'm pretty late now. (I'm crediting that to wedding stress.) I know God intended Eddie to be my "forever someone," and who knows if it will take forever for that next little someone to appear or not. Eddie is 30, almost 31, and I am just barely 26, and we're beginning the journey together – along with you all! So please, feel free to read along, comment, advise and just listen!

~Amanda~



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