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Trouble Conceiving

It's Been a Year: Now What?

Part I

By Lyn Mettler

Before you decide to seek help, Dr. Keye recommends you and your partner have a discussion, if you haven't already, about whether you'd be willing to consider adoption. After all, he points out, if you're going to pay the high cost of infertility, which does not guarantee that you'll end up with a baby, you might consider adoption where the money you invest definitely results in a child.

Also, for couples who are young (30 and below), have no obvious medical problems and are not in a hurry, you might consider trying for six months to a year more. A study by researchers at the National Institute of Environmental Health Sciences in North Carolina found that – unless the male was over 40 – only one in 10 couples failed to conceive in the second year of trying. On the flip side, however, according to Dr. Barmat, studies have shown that after three years of trying without success, the chances are very low that the couple will ever conceive.

Melanie Morrissey Clark, co-author of The Fertility Handbook (Addicus Books, 2002) and mother to triplets conceived via in vitro fertilization, cautions couples not to waste time. "Get help as soon as you suspect a problem, because the woman's age is the No. 1 factor in the couple's success in conceiving and carrying a pregnancy to term," she says. "Time is your best ally if you use it wisely." She was 31 when her babies were born.

Mandy Parton, 29, of Dallas, Texas, who has been trying to conceive for two years, waited a little longer before seeking help. "We sought fertility help right after we hit the one-year mark," she says. "We saw one specialist and didn't get such a good vibe from him. We investigated adoption for a while after that, and then we returned to the 'world of infertility'."

Want to see more?

• Who's Who? An Infertility Starting Lineup
• The Infertility Marketplace: Terms You Need to Know
• Trouble Conceiving? Get the Right Medical Care!
• To the Point: Acupuncture for Conception
• Fertility and Flexibility: Yoga When You're Trying to Conceive
• Predicting Ovulation Using Saliva: A Review of the Ovulite Fertility Test
• Check out our Article Library.
• Join the discussion on our Family.com community!

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