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Men and Fertility Testing
Encouraging Your Husband to Face Fertility Challenges
By Teri Brown
Dr. Schreier says fertility counselors can help in several ways. If the woman comes alone, a fertility counselor can assist with tips and hints to involve the male partner as a team member and making it a team effort. Also, a good fertility counselor can coach the woman on what the reality may mean for either party.
"While women often get depressed and show their depression, men are socialized not to show their feelings," Dr. Schreier says. "They may rather get angry or shut down in the face of too much emotion and sadness. As a counselor, I encourage immediate and early involvement of the partner as an equal decision maker."
The fertility counselor can also serve as an educator and soundboard. Because they are empathetic to both the gender and cultural meanings of not being able to reproduce, a counselor can affirm both partners as individuals and acknowledge their losses while reaffirming that true parenthood is in the child-parent relationship and education of the child, not just pregnancy and birth. Getting your husband to be a true partner in the quest for fertility may be a bit tricky, but it can be done with the right amount of sensitivity and tact.
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