728x90
my iParenting
From Our Sponsors
e-newsletters
Sign up to receive our free weekly e-newsletters

new terms of use
new privacy policy
award-winning products
The iParenting Media Awards program helps parents find the best products for their families.
Home › Articles › Transracial Adoption › Racial Reactions

Racial Reactions

When Your Family Crosses
Color Lines

By Michele St. Martin

Pages:  1  2  3  4  

To apply this to adoption, parents who may be comfortable adopting from one racial group may not be prepared to adopt from another. Though all groups face racial stereotyping, the stereotype of an African-American boy is very different from that of a Chinese girl, as are the challenges and expectations the family and child will face.

Preparing Friends and Family
Even if a single person or couple is comfortable with adopting a child of another race, they may face resistance from friends or family. Roberta Rosenberg and her husband, Rob,adopted two babies from Korea after secondary infertility. "We had more than half a dozen miscarriages after the birth of our daughter," Rosenberg says. "Then we decided we wanted to be parents again more than we wanted to try for one more viable pregnancy."

After reviewing the options, they decided on adoption, specifically, adopting from Korea. Rosenberg's husband had some concerns about the reactions of extended family and their acceptance of adopted children of color. "Not only hadn't anyone adopted on either side of our immediate families, they didn't really know any people of color,"he says. "It seemed like a lot for them to accept in one fell swoop."

Hall agrees that the idea of transracial adoption is not always easy for families to accept initially. "A lot of us went through infertility, and it was profoundly painful," Hall says. "We struggled with adoption and then with what race of child to adopt. We then expected our immediate families to accept our decision with joy and glee. I'm guilty of this. We have to understand that adopting transracially is a process. Most of us didn't grow up knowing we'd parent children who look very different from us in a racist society. If you need 100-percent support from your family, tell them that."

Hall suggests a letter, so that family members have time to read and digest the news and then act appropriately. "Explain how you got to [the decision to adopt transracially],"she says. "Let family members know that while you're fine with questions,you're not inviting them to try to change your minds."

Pages:  1  2  3  4  


Want to see more?