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Gift-giver

Profile of a Surrogate Mother

By Jessica Williams

It was time to act. Kat chose not to work with an agency, but to offer herself to couples independently. "I did not want a formal, business-like relationship with someone that was on the other side of the country," she says. Rather than have to wait for updates, meetings, and other details from an agency, "I wanted to be the person with the information first-hand." Kat felt she should not be "just a number and not necessarily a priority."

Kat learned that there are two types of surrogate mothers. A traditional surrogate mother not only carries the child, but she also "donates" one of her own eggs. The egg is fertilized with the intended father's sperm – the intended mother has no biological relation to the child. A gestational surrogate (GS) is not biologically related to the child she carries because she is implanted with an embryo created either by the intended parents (most common) or a combination of a donor egg or sperm from third parties.

"I knew immediately that I would only be able to become a gestational surrogate," says Kat. "I knew that I would be able to give a child back to his or her natural parents after nurturing him or her for 9 months." Kat recognizes that many women are able to be traditional surrogates and respects that facet of surrogacy as well. "I do have a lot of admiration for women who can [be traditional surrogates], because they are really giving a huge part of themselves for the sake of the creation of another person's family."

Kat was introduced to the intnded parents she's working with through a friend on the Internet. "She knew of a couple that she thought would be a great match for me, and before long, we were up at their home having lunch!" Kat and the intended parents, residing only about 140 miles away, knew they were a match right away and decided to move forward immediately.

Want to see more?

• The Surrogacy Search: Starting Out
• The Surrogacy Search: In Their Own Words
• Donor Decisions: Considering Donor Egg & Sperm
• Check out our Article Library.
• Talk about it!