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Life After Stillbirth and Miscarriage

One Woman's Story of Pregnancy Loss and Survival

By Jessica Frank

I was able to get the D&C the next day. It wasn't that bad. What was bad was watching woman after woman be wheeled into the operating room and delivery room to have their babies. I even had to sit and watch a prisoner being escorted by guards be wheeled into the room to give birth. All I kept thinking was Why me? The pity party had begun.

It didn't hit me until about two days later that I had lost another baby. I was lower than low at this point. My breasts had filled with milk, and the hormones must have dropped because I have never felt so depressed in my life.

What to do? I had been the inspiration for so many girls. I was even counseling others who had gone through stillbirths and miscarriages. I was starting to smile again. I was not going to allow myself to be depressed.

I called a reproductive endocrinologist and made an appointment. If it is hormonal, I'm going to battle those hormones and win. If it's a sperm or an egg issue, Andy and I are both willing to go for donors. We're open to anything. We just want to be parents.

We're also still in the midst of the adoption process, and I've kicked that into full gear. I'm going to be a mom one way or another. This is just a setback, right? So I've dusted off my fertility monitor, sterilized thermy, my basal thermometer, and am ready to rock and roll. I'm going to live by the mottos "Three strikes and you're out" and "Good things come in threes," and hopefully my own personal motto will be "Three times is the charm." I'll let you know if that one's true in nine months.

Want to see more?

• Peaceful Pregnancy with Progesterone: Can Progesterone Treatment Help Prevent Miscarriage and Preterm Birth?
• You've Had a Miscarriage: Taking Steps to Reduce the Risk of Miscarrying Again
• Pregnancy After Miscarriage: What to Expect from Pregnancy After Miscarriage
• Life after Miscarriage: Preparing for a Healthy Pregnancy After Miscarriage
• Join the discussion on our Family.com community!