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Self-insemination

Using Self-insemination as a Private Conception Alternative

By Kelly Burgess

Andrea Evans*, 33, and her partner, Leslie Fielding*, 30, of San Jose, Calif., probably gave more consideration to the idea of having a baby than most couples. In addition to the usual questions they asked themselves about the commitment parenthood requires, they investigated other factors of childbearing that are important to gay and lesbian couples, such as custody issues and alternate conception techniques. In the end, they decided to try self-insemination using anonymous, frozen sperm from a sperm bank. Fielding is expecting their child in May.

After reviewing their options, self-insemination was a no-brainer for Evans and Fielding. "We were very interested in not medicalizing a process that should be very natural and personal," Evans says. "We have friends who had had a baby through self-insemination, so we knew it could be done easily and a bit more cheaply at home, but primarily we were just wanting to keep the process as a loving time between us. We talked a lot about not wanting an overly medicalized birth, so it seemed silly to go that route for the insemination."

Self-insemination is not limited to gays and lesbians. It's also an option for single women who want to have a child but don't have a male partner and for heterosexual couples who want to use donor sperm. Evans says that she viewed a fertility clinic not as a place to start, but as a place to go if their own efforts were unsuccessful.

This, according to Carol Frost, a fertility counselor in Stoneham, Mass., and author of Helping the Stork (John Wiley & Sons, 1997), is a good approach to the journey toward conception. "Self-insemination is a great way to get started," she says. "If low tech works, it's wonderful to have avoided the downside of high tech."

Those downsides include the cost, the impersonal atmosphere and often, for lesbians and single women, discrimination. "Many private clinics discriminate against lesbians or single women," says Lisa Saffron, a London-based activist. "Because self-insemination involves informal arrangements, there is no institution involved to deny lesbians access to the service or to make judgments as to their suitability to become a parent."

Saffron, who has written and lectured extensively on gay parenting issues and is the founder of Pink Parents

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