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The Pregnancy Challenge

Should You Have Kids?

Should you have kids? Take these simple tests to find to determine whether or not you are ready to have children.

Smear peanut butter on the sofa and curtains. Now rub your hands in the wet flower bed and rub them on the walls. Cover the stains with crayons. Place a fish stick behind the couch and leave it there all summer.

Obtain a 55-gallon box of Legos. (If Legos are not available, you may substitute roofing tacks or broken bottles.) Have a friend spread them all over the house. Put on a blindfold. Try to walk to the bathroom or kitchen. Do not scream. (Screaming could wake a child at night.)

Borrow one or two small animals (goats are best) and take them with you as you shop at the grocery store. Always keep them in sight and pay for anything they eat or damage.

Obtain one large, unhappy, live octopus. Stuff into a small net bag making sure that all arms stay inside.

Obtain a large plastic milk jug. Fill halfway with water. Suspend from the ceiling with a stout cord. Start the jug swinging. Try to insert spoonfuls of soggy cereal (such as Fruit Loops or Cheerios) into the mouth of the jug, while pretending to be an airplane. Now dump the contents of the jug all over the floor.

Want to see more?

• Your Crystal Ball: Don't You Dare Have Kids Until You Read This!
• Mulling Over Motherhood: Do You Really Want to Be a Mom?
• Money, Marriage and Medicine: Some Things to Think About
• Talk about it!

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