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Home › Articles › Alternative Family Building › The Surrogacy Search

The Surrogacy Search

In Their Own Words

Part Two

By Michele St. Martin

Pages:  1  2  3  4  

Suzie feels that this kind of support is crucial to making a surrogacy arrangement work. "I think it is very important that all parties involved are in full support of this," she says. "It was crucial to us that Tara's husband agreed with this plan. Our doctor required that we all attend one session with a psychologist before agreeing to this procedure."

Like Sharon and Tara, Lucy's husband fully supports her surrogate pregnancy. Though he initially had reservations about the arrangement, after he met with a surrogate counselor, he was not only reassured, but became "as active as possible in my surrogacy journey," says Lucy. "He was the surrogate father," giving shots, attending appointments when the intended parents couldn't, and ultimately becoming the Lamaze coach.

Facing the Fear
What of the fears that the surrogate will want to keep the child, fears generated through stories like that of Mary Beth Whitehead and "Baby M"? Surrogates Sharon and Lucy, who both have children of their own, agree that a surrogate pregnancy is different from being pregnant with their own child.

"When you are carrying your own children, you have hopes and plans for them," says Sharon. "You wonder whom they are going to look like and what their personality is going to be like. Your extended family is excited and everyone is planning for the new addition. This is not the way of carrying a surrogate baby. As a surrogate, I mainly focus on how happy the parents are going to be and how their family will be completed because I could be there to help them achieve their dreams."


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